Today I will experience myself as…
…unable to bend
…willing to bend
Every day I have one thing I must get clear on before I approach the day, I have to know who I intend to be that day. This brings me clarity of purpose, ease in making decisions, and arms me with an indelible truth about who I am that erases the barriers to creating.
Each day I start out knowing who I intend to be, I have a foot up on the day. I feel freer and more willing to take chances. This practice gives me what I am looking for, comfort and peace and a little more knowing for what is ahead. And I only have to focus on today. Tomorrow is another day.
So the practice starts in the morning when I sit with my pen poised above a pad of paper and wait. I listen for the words that appear in my mind. I start with, Today I will experience myself as… AND THEN I LISTEN. Soon it appears: unable to bend, willing to bend, bending, blending.
Yes, I know these are verbs, but they are verbs that describe the action of a person that is open for change, willing to change, experiencing change, and incorporating change. And that feels powerful.
Each day four items show up in my mind that tell me what this day has to offer me. For me to experience happiness and fulfillment, all I have to do is remember who I have planned to be that day, and act accordingly. The next day I get to start over with 4 new insights.
We are not here to have a life absent of challenge, so the presence of challenge in our lives does not mean we are broken. It only means we have decided to challenge ourselves all in answer to the messages we are sending out each day: God give me strength to endure is a prayerful way we communicate that we are feeling challenged and vulnerable, incapable and unprepared, and that we need help. This message sets into motion the notion that what we want to experience that day is triumph, overcoming odds, reaching the pinnacle, unfaltering faith, physical and emotional endurance, and a payoff or payout for the faith that we have exhibited.
A few days ago the gauntlet was thrown down when I was introduced to the idea that another section for the book I am working on was coming. RESISTANCE!! This keeps happening. Just when I think I have the formula and the book is near completion, along comes another chapter or perspective and I feel like I am starting over again.
Do I sound a little weary? Yes. And not the kind of weary where I am willing to bend. Bending was yesterday’s mission and I did it well, eventually feeling lifted into a new realm of consciousness just by knowing that bending is one option when challenge comes knocking, one that I found a trust for and happily invited.
But today is not about being unable to bend, then willing to bend, then bending, and ultimately blending. Today is about giving up, letting go, trusting faith, and responding to the call. Today I am fortified by yesterday’s success, and I am again willing to be that which I have not been before. I am even anticipatory of the events of the day and do not despair that the writing taking place is not in the book but in this blog.
Today I am armed with the knowledge that yesterday was blissful because I learned I could be unable to bend but willing to and then understanding how to and then grateful for the experience. And tomorrow I will look back on today and be grateful for this day because I let go of weariness and gave up the feeling that I couldn’t. I said okay one more time, letting go, trusting faith, and responding to the call.